Updates at a very high price.

Readers, I trust you are the variety of people to be educated (somewhat), I trust you people to actually give a shit when I write something, if you don't that's completely fine.

But moving on, I've found quite recently, that 24 hours in a day, simply isn't enough anymore, I want more time.

Because I hate what I do. I hate that I go home and wait until an hour before midnight to start my homework. I hate that the seven fucking hours in between are spent on facebook, playing Fifa, watching reruns of shows, and on instant messaging (maybe not as much). I hate the fact that it's killing me, that I'm a slave to routine.

But I know what I want, I want out of this, I want to be a better person. But what the hell does that even mean? What is this "better"? Better? That's just another word used by them, a word that they use to shut you down, to bring you to the ground. When they say "better", they're not praising you, they're fuming in silence, they're filled with things like: disappointment, like envy, and condescension.

When they say "better", they're saying, "You're not good enough".

So why do I aim for better, and not the best? Because the best is for those who are perfect, those who aren't human. There's the best, and then there's the best for what we have, and on a larger scale, that's simply "better".

But I think I've finally found it, the missing link I searched with full endeavor only a few months ago. I've found my will. Or ironically, I've found that I'm missing a will, a strive to become the better person. Without the will, without the map, how does a mere imperfection in the image of the almighty even begin to wonder how he's to reach his destination?

I must find my will.

And I urge you readers to find yours, find your passion, find your driving force, because you're nothing without it, you're just like the rest of us, like me, damned to live life as a routine, in the epitome of the word autonomy.

Damned to live a life full of meaningless, full of time wasted, full of empty pleasures and reading the drivel that I write.

Find it, because the world is beautiful, and it's waiting for you, it always has been.