By His Bootstraps.

Salutations for the first time in a while, my beloved X and Y chromosomes.

Did you miss me?

Of course not.

So like, shit!
What has been happening since I last clickity-clacked at the keyboard staring at blank pixels? Not much, and I feel like shit for not being able to post something that stares "boring" in the face and rips its tonsil out, before proceeding to tie said tonsil to a tree, before finally roundhouse kicking the word boring in the face over the Grand Fuckin' Canyon; leaving it to die hanging by its tonsil.

But the problem is starting these posts my dear readers. So fucking cliche, but it's cliche for a reason isn't it? But I've started, and I'm not going to stop until I'm expended, or until I return to Entourage anyway.

So it's been like, godamnit, half the holidays passed already, and isn't it damn shameful that I have nothing to show for it. The revelation. We all have it, don't we? The feeling of,

"Holidays are over already? Damn, time flies by when you're having fun, doesn't it?"

Which is all nice, but then you get to the

"I wonder what I've done ... great, fucking nothing"

, which is inevitably completed by the

"shit, look how much homework I've got, I'm so f@cked"

.

And such is the life I live, but not this time, there's about 10 days left, and I swear on my math-book-shitting Hermit Crab's grave [god bless his soul], that I will have reported back by the end of the holidays, and I will have accomplished something. You best look forward to it, but don't hold your breath.

But now onto something more socially, and angsty subject.

Fucking promises.

Fuck that. What the hell is a promise?


prom·ise
   /ˈprɒmɪs/ Show Spelled [prom-is] Show IPA noun, verb, -ised, -is·ing.
–noun
1.
a declaration that something will or will not be done, given, etc., by one: unkept political promises.
2.
an express assurance on which expectation is to be based: promises that an enemy will not win.
3.
something that has the effect of an express assurance; indication of what may be expected.

Cutting to the chase, a promise is essentially, a declaration that asserts an emphasized expectation on a value statement.

For example:

I promise you that I will slit your throat and eat your vocal chords marinated in your bile.

Now, don't get me wrong, promising implies honesty, and that's what we should aim at, right? I mean, we ought to adhere to our word, and we ought not go against our word, fair enough? That's fair enough.

But the problem is, the fucking Achilles heel in the matter, is the expectation aspect with regard to promise. Points can just as easily be put across without the mentioning of a promise. For example, I'm going to buy you a male stripper, you raging homosexual, compared to, I promise I'll buy you a male stripper, you raging homosexual. I'm no moral psychologist, I'm no neuroscientist, I don't know why this phenomenon happens, but it does. What phenomenon? It's the implications of bringing "I promise" into the matter.

For a reason beyond my comprehension, maybe it's a sociological issue, promises brings with it a dark passenger called expectation. The greater expectation to keep your word. And this, consequentially, results in a greater disappointment when the expectations aren't met.

I'll throw you a big 21'st birthday party.
Pleasure if successful = 70% [Depending on many factors, but the figure is purely hypothetical.]
Pain if unsuccessful = 30%

I promise you a big party for your 21st birthday.

Pleasure if successful = 75% [Depending on many factors, but the extra 5% comes from the completion of the promise.]
Pain if unsuccessful = 50% [More so than if one hadn't promised anyway.]

Meandering aside, that's what it all boils down for from a utilitarian perspective, in my opinion. That a promise is simply just a risk one takes to attain a little more pleasure, but failure breeds an expontentially larger amount of pain. And I think the risk is stupid, because it's an illogical gamble.

This is all generically speaking of course, but I challenge you to propose to me a promise where the presence of "I promise" breeds more pleasure than the pain resulted from failure to adhere to such a promise.

So fuck promises, to promise truthfully is to act badly, and to act badly is stupid.

Loosely covered, that's my take on promises, thanks Dianne for the idea ;D, and I'll finish these ideas up in the future.

But anyway, I'll get another post out by the end of the holidays.

Also, and I will be doing this more often:

cheers to will for an awesome party.
cheers to optus for uncapping me 8).

also, to celebrate my new blog post: